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Take it easy guys.. Time to relac


Agent 96
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1)

有个乡下女佣打扫女主人的房间,找到用过的避孕套,便用很怪的眼神看着女主人。。。

女主人问:“你们乡下没有做爱吗?”

女佣回答:“有做爱,但没做到脱皮!”

(哈哈哈哈哈)

2)

店员:“请你不要在这里抽烟!”

阿黑:“奇怪,你的店里卖香烟,却不肯给人抽烟?”

店员:“我的店里也卖安全套,你要不要在这里做爱?”

(哈哈哈哈哈)

3)

斑马深爱小鹿却被小鹿拒绝,为什么?

小鹿:“我妈说纹身的都是不良少年。。。”

小鸡深爱小鸭也被拒绝,为什么?

小鸭:“我妈说叫鸡得都不是好人!”。。。。

(哈哈哈哈哈。。。)

Anyone wanna add on, pls do so.. :peace:

A broken heart, A life torn apart.

Screams with no sound.

No solution to be found.

Forsaken by all, Blood spatterd on a wall.

Left all alone, Still as a stone.

Locked in eternal sleep, No more tears to weep...

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1)

有个乡下女佣打扫女主人的房间,找到用过的避孕套,便用很怪的眼神看着女主人。。。

女主人问:“你们乡下没有做爱吗?”

女佣回答:“有做爱,但没做到脱皮!”

(哈哈哈哈哈)

2)

店员:“请你不要在这里抽烟!”

阿黑:“奇怪,你的店里卖香烟,却不肯给人抽烟?”

店员:“我的店里也卖安全套,你要不要在这里做爱?”

(哈哈哈哈哈)

3)

斑马深爱小鹿却被小鹿拒绝,为什么?

小鹿:“我妈说纹身的都是不良少年。。。”

小鸡深爱小鸭也被拒绝,为什么?

小鸭:“我妈说叫鸡得都不是好人!”。。。。

(哈哈哈哈哈。。。)

Anyone wanna add on, pls do so.. :peace:

*Translation, I tried ma best, I feel that they are much farnier in mandarin...*

1)

There's a maid from countryside cleaning her mistress's room, found a used condom, thus giving the mistress a wierd look...

Mistress: "Dun the pple at ur side have ###### too?"

Maid:"Yes we do, but not to the extend of the skin peeling"

(HaHaHaHaHa)

2)

Shopkeeper:"Please do not smoke here!"

Customer:"Hmm... That's weird, cigarets are sold here and yet we can't smoke here?"

Shopkeeper:"We sell condoms too, do u wanna have ######, here?"

(HaHaHaHaHa)

3)

A Zebra is madly in love wif a Deer, but was rejected. Why?

Deer:"My Mom tells me pple wif tattoos are bad company..."

A Chicken is madly in love wif a Duck, but was rejected. Why?

Duck:"My mom tells me pple who calls chicken are bad pple..."

*Calls chicken in mandarin, aka, calling for prostitude*

(HaHaHaHaHa)

A broken heart, A life torn apart.

Screams with no sound.

No solution to be found.

Forsaken by all, Blood spatterd on a wall.

Left all alone, Still as a stone.

Locked in eternal sleep, No more tears to weep...

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  • SRC Member

*Translation, I tried ma best, I feel that they are much farnier in mandarin...*

1)

There's a maid from countryside cleaning her mistress's room, found a used condom, thus giving the mistress a wierd look...

Mistress: "Dun the pple at ur side have ###### too?"

Maid:"Yes we do, but not to the extend of the skin peeling"

(HaHaHaHaHa)

2)

Shopkeeper:"Please do not smoke here!"

Customer:"Hmm... That's weird, cigarets are sold here and yet we can't smoke here?"

Shopkeeper:"We sell condoms too, do u wanna have ######, here?"

(HaHaHaHaHa)

3)

A Zebra is madly in love wif a Deer, but was rejected. Why?

Deer:"My Mom tells me pple wif tattoos are bad company..."

A Chicken is madly in love wif a Duck, but was rejected. Why?

Duck:"My mom tells me pple who calls chicken are bad pple..."

*Calls chicken in mandarin, aka, calling for prostitude*

(HaHaHaHaHa)

hi bro...

u reali power man...

so free why not studying hehe ( just joking)

cheers :)

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Working/Studying now...

Quite 'Eng' lah... :lol::lol: For now..... <_< *Keeping fingers cross*

A broken heart, A life torn apart.

Screams with no sound.

No solution to be found.

Forsaken by all, Blood spatterd on a wall.

Left all alone, Still as a stone.

Locked in eternal sleep, No more tears to weep...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • SRC Member

Here are some more jokes in the same question and answer format.

●差別 (一)

問:「女朋友和老婆有何差別?」

答:「差15公斤。」

●差別 (二)

問:「男朋友和老公有何差別?」

答:「差45分鐘。」

●差別 (三)

問:「男人對女人講話不正經叫做什麼?」

答:「叫做性騷擾。」

●差別 (四)

問:「女人對男人說話不正經叫什麼?」

答:「叫做每分鐘二元付費熱線。」

●差別 (五)

問:「怎樣知道你老婆已去世?」

答:「性生活沒改變,但碗盤很久沒人洗了。」

●差別 (六)

問:「怎樣知道妳老公已去世?」

答:「性生活沒改變,但遙控器終於落到妳手上了。」

●差別 (七)

問:「女人腰部以下癱瘓叫做什麼?」

答:「已婚婦女。」

●差別 (八)

問:「換個電燈泡需要多少男人?」

答:「一個也不需要,他們只會坐在黑暗裡抱怨。」

●差別 (九)

問:「直達男人心裡最快的方式為何?」

答:「利刃穿心。」

●差別 (十)

問:「男人和停車位有何相似之處?」

答:「所有好位子都被佔了,剩下的都是殘障專用。」

●差別 (十一)

問:「男人和公共廁所有和相似之處?」

答:「所有好位子都被佔了,剩下的都是一堆堆的屎。」

●差別 (十二)

問:「男人和地磚有何相似之處?」

答:「如果第一次鋪的時候,鋪得很好的話,可以在上面踩一輩子沒問題。」

●差別 (十三)

問:「男人和老鼠魚(清道夫魚)有何異同?」

答:「同樣是吃垃圾的,只是其中之一是魚。」

●差別 (十四)

問:「為何男人喜歡娶處女?」

答:「因為男人受不了批評。」

●差別 (十五)

問:「為何女人很難找到敏感、體貼、又好看的男人?」

答:「因為那樣的男人都有男朋友了。」

●差別 (十六)

問:「對男人來說?『安全的性』是什麼?」

答:「床頭板有軟墊。」

●差別 (十七)

問:「女人為何要假裝高潮?」

答:「因為男人總是假裝『前戲』。」

●差別 (十八)

問:「什麼讓男人去追求自己並不想娶回家的女人?」

答:「是什麼讓狗去追自己不想開的汽車,同樣道理。」

●差別 (19)

問:「無神論者的最大問題是什麼?」

答:「性高潮時,無人可呼喊。」

●差別 (20)

問:「天體營理怎樣的男人最受歡迎?」

答:「可以兩手各拿一杯咖啡,又可同時拿一打甜甜圈的男人。」

●差別 (21)

問:「天體營裡怎樣的女人最受歡迎?」

答:「可以吃到最後一個甜甜圈的女人。」

●差別 (22)

問:「男人為何喜歡沖澡勝過泡澡?」

答:「因為泡澡時尿尿太噁心。」

●差別 (23)

問:「恐怖份子和女人有何不同?」

答:「恐怖份子可以談條件,女人不行。」

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