what to do .. i am helpless.....

[neokn]

Sorry to intur...

I read many replies from male SRC members but not the female, I believe that there are some around.

Do think that its wiser to listen to both side of the story and advise from both gender. Coz currently, we are listening to your side of the story. No offence, bro.

Cheers and reef well, cheong lfs well.

[minsmarine]

Where is he ? Is he OK now ?

Does some1 know him personally to check whether he is ok ?

I hope he is not jumping out from 10th floor for broken heart.

[sps_dude]

i am OK bro....... for now this is what i will do.......

i will put aside what little pride i have for 1 week........

if she doesnt call by then...... she knows it..... i dont feel comfortable scolding girls......... haiz........ its not i am insecure,,.......i am forced to be insecure..... she is those type of loose her virgin*** at pri 6....... i pitied her and took her as my stead...... shower her with all that i could give..... spend my last cent on treating her to a good dinner..... and i felt its my responsibility to take care of her... her late father told me to........ but now..... look how she treat me... any ladies in here pls advice........ flubby ???????

[lightningstrike]

i am OK bro....... for now this is what i will do.......

i will put aside what little pride i have for 1 week........

if she doesnt call by then...... she knows it..... i dont feel comfortable scolding girls......... haiz........ its not i am insecure,,.......i am forced to be insecure..... she is those type of loose her virgin*** at pri 6....... i pitied her and took her as my stead...... shower her with all that i could give..... spend my last cent on treating her to a good dinner..... and i felt its my responsibility to take care of her... her late father told me to........ but now..... look how she treat me... any ladies in here pls advice........ flubby ???????

i did not wanna get involved in this thread at all, but after reading up ur last post (as quoted), do u think u deserve it? do u hv any idea what u r talking abt here? no intention of flaming here, but u shld go reflect on what u hv juz said. i m sure if sis flubbey sees this, she will definitely agree wif me 2.

juz me 2 cents.

[that was niceeeee]

mi still student ar..but this type of gal no gd de..so go find a better one whihc accept u n also likes refing than cna liao

[dradttg]

Bro,

Since you feel so 'forced' to feel insecure. Give it up. The relationship will go nowhere. Isnt it worse to get marry and worry that the child is yours or not?

If she has nothing to do with the other guy, she would have told him to stop calling.

You are still young, stop waiting your time.

[Marineman]

i am OK bro....... for now this is what i will do.......

i will put aside what little pride i have for 1 week........

if she doesnt call by then...... she knows it..... i dont feel comfortable scolding girls......... haiz........ its not i am insecure,,.......i am forced to be insecure..... she is those type of loose her virgin*** at pri 6....... i pitied her and took her as my stead...... shower her with all that i could give..... spend my last cent on treating her to a good dinner..... and i felt its my responsibility to take care of her... her late father told me to........ but now..... look how she treat me... any ladies in here pls advice........ flubby ???????

Bro,

You are ONLY 17, still a long way to go. It is very common for teens your age to go through these relationship emotions. You will go though a few of these before you eventually settle down, this may be your first but will not be your last. Most people will not marry their first date (I'm not sure about your case).

Look at the long term, your relationship is already heading this direction, why bother to make it work, afterall you are 17, if you are much much older with children, then it is a worthwhile effort to make the relationship work for the sake of the children.

My advice is to go out mix/meet more people and leave this relationship aside, if she comes back to you, you decide if you still wants to continue or be just friends, otherwise, move on, you have many years ahead of you. Focus on your studies, it's year end and exam time young man.

[minsmarine]

i am OK bro....... for now this is what i will do.......

i will put aside what little pride i have for 1 week........

if she doesnt call by then...... she knows it..... i dont feel comfortable scolding girls......... haiz........ its not i am insecure,,.......i am forced to be  insecure..... she is those type of loose her virgin*** at pri 6....... i pitied her and took her as my stead...... shower her with all that i could give..... spend my last cent on treating her to a good dinner..... and i felt its my responsibility to take care of her... her late father told me to........ but now..... look how she treat me... any ladies in here pls advice........ flubby ???????

It may be a bit tricky, however vir*** should not be standard anymore like in early 20s. We are now in 21st Century and just think of it. Singapore is more and more like America now aday. So open , you can even catch ONS in local pub. So nothing to shout about anymore.

Think yourself first, DO U LOVE HER TRUELY

Than if your answer is YES, I will tell you my story. For now, just sit down and think and think.........

Oh yea forget to tell you when I was like in your age, I fall in love with some1, I followed her, show her my interest, my love, my blood for 3 and half years. Finally I managed to get her love, but she is not my wife

So just think.........

[sps_dude]

point taken...... i really do like her.... its just recently this guy..... keep calling her that i feel suspicious....... and she has a different boyfriend when she was in pri 6..... i think lightningstrike should get what i mean.....

[ryz]

a guy calling her 5 times a day chatting with her like he is her boyfren is intolerable lah... Lucky man almost happen to me b4... my good fren(female) used to call me quite regularly.. my GF slightly suspicious.. so I brought a group of frens inclucding my good fren out with my gf and introduced them to one another.now that they're frens things are that bad lah... but must still refrain from socialising with her that much also... that is basic things that u must give up for ur GF... I believe it works the other way as well.. her behavior is just too insensitive... nothing like what I would expect from a lady. maybe u could ask her to introduce u to the guy.. "talk" to him... but then again this might not be a good idea... she might very well be two timing you and not letting u know... sigh~ sadz.. I feel for u bro.. If I were u I'd forget her... go out with ur frens.. go LFsing or busy urself with something else that wouldn't remind u of her.. 2 weeks later u should feel ready for the "hunt" again.. haa.. make it official break up with her first.

[minsmarine]

Than can I suggest, you show her nothing happen. Mean, you don't worry to much when she received the call ( don't even ask ). And show her more care. No flower, No chocolate ( I hate these , I never bought flower for the gal , just waste money ). Spend more time with her.

By doing that , you given her the message that

"I don't care what ever you are doing, but I JUST SIMPLEY LOVE YOU".

It's how I won some1 love from some1 hand after 3 and half year. Haa Haa enjoying loving some1else

[lightningstrike]

point taken...... i really do like her.... its just recently this guy..... keep calling her that i feel suspicious....... and she has a different boyfriend when she was in pri 6..... i think lightningstrike should get what i mean.....

No. i dun get what u r trying to say. must be the blood that is rushing to my head at the moment that is making me stupid. enuff said. i dun wish to comment further, din even wanted to post in the first place till i saw "that" post by the thread starter himself.

[shoelevy]

hey man...taking her because u pitied her...that's strike 3 and out!

u can;t do that and expect it to work out.

in fact, she has to deal with it herself because she was either foolish or irresponsible...u think by taking her in u will help her with her past?...it doesn't work that way.

i think u put her down for 3-4weeks....see if she calls....if u don't call and she likes u, she will gian....then call u...but if somehow u find out that during this period of cool off, she's done nothing but talk to that guy 5 times a dae....then forget it...she's not worth it....common.....u must wake up to the reality that this situation is really grim

but if she does call, talk to her about wat u just told us....she needs to know too so she can understand how u feel, but pls...don't tell her u took her out of pity for goodness sake!

[dleecool]

DOn't worry when u get rich, u can get all the girl u want Be COOL!

[35Cents]

Sps dude...sorry for your troubles. I understand how u are feeling as I went down this path before (6 years relationship, started young and she ran away with some ang mo).

The ultimate sadness people feel during a breakup is usually not the lost of the other party. It's the lost of the visions or dreams you have in the future with him/her. Go consider peacefully, you will arrive to the rite conclusion.

Important thing right now is to make sure that other aspects of your life is still going well.... i.e studies, work and reefing . Don't screw these up no matter wat happens between you n her. If not you will really regret this in the later stages in life. My experience caused me to repeat 2 years of my studies in poly....sigh. But its ok now, life been good. Now looking back I even smile at how much I had learned from it.

Breaking up or making up is utimately up to you. Cannot get the real answer from any forums. If make up, give her what she yearns for. If break up, do it like a gentleman and remain friends.

[sps_dude]

dont worry... my studies and reefeing will definately not be gone.... i feel my reefing will be up..... buy more equipment .... should make me happy..... haha... no larz.... i guess i need time to cool down......

[giantbicycle]

dont worry... my studies and reefeing will definately not be gone.... i feel my reefing will be up..... buy more equipment .... should make me happy..... haha... no larz.... i guess i need time to cool down......

yeah man....see some awesome tank ....Drool yourself and try to forget all that is bad and pass...A new day will come and old day will soon Pass.Lt time do the job..goodluck...Go LFs..admire LS..

[clammy]

Dont be a wuss.

Check out this website.

www.doubleyourdating.com

[Melvyn Tan]

Agree with Riot and the rest of the bros. Dump her.. lots of fishes in the sea.. Hope you have fully 'utilised' her for the past couple of years or so

Wow !!! feel so touched when so many people so concern for this 17 yr old bro in here.....

First let me give you a hug feel better ? Now you know why i ask whats your age and her's?

Life is really all about learning, everyday we are all learning....it is through this learning, that we gain experience and subsequently we can help others.....so you have now learned alot in this experience (and others experiences).

Although the lass lost her virginity in pri 6.....do you all out there think she's condemned? was it really her fault? perhaps yes, perhaps no......wonder why is there young persons charter and women's charter...it is for the simple principle fact that young persons are more gullible and prone to kenna con.....so give the girl a break.....

So dude.....cheerup and gather up yourself....

Alfa...can help it... really like the way put it "utilised her" tsk tsk....perhaps older bros here wanna bring our fren to Tiananmen or Club Kabuki? hehhehehe too young cannot go in......

[shoelevy]

oh darn....sth happened todae and i'm also feeling down because of a girl.

girls...so hard to pls so hard to udnersatnd....love them hate them...............

[Tigger]

dump her, there is always other girls around........

[RockyBoy]

You are still young and long way to go. The ocean is big enough to for you to venture and look for those who would treat you well. Dump her, get on your life and start fishing again.

[sps_dude]

thanks u guys........ lightning strike...... i really dont know what u trying to say........ just say it out........ if u dont want to comment then dont....... nobody forced you to...... why then did u choose to comment...... its ur choice.....

[lightningstrike]

here's my choice. post publicly to let other reefers see what u hv pm me and how i hv replied. let others judge for themselves. oredi stated in my pm that i m not aunt agony. u want my 2 cents, u hv my exact 2 cents.

Sent: Re:whats wrong ???, Sep 24 2004, 03:18 PM

bro.. mind telling me whats wrong with that sentence ??? pl correct my mistake....... thanks....no worries no offence taken....

i dunno where to start, but here goes nothing..........

i dunno what ur problem in ur relationship and i dun wish to know 2........ noticed that i din ask. i m not aunt agony here. i'll be very frank and direct wif u.

its not i am insecure,,.......i am forced to be insecure..... 

who's forcing u to be insecured? nobody. urself! hv ever considered if she might hv felt insecured or inferior too?

she is those type of loose her virgin*** 

this is where i really begin to boil although it is no business of mine. by posting this, u r oredi belittling her, looking down on her. no matter what she has done to u or whatsoever, do u understand what r called privacy, rights, etc....... put urself in her shoes la. if i were a personal fren of urs and i m a src reefer. i know both of u. i c this thread in src. noticed that u said such things abt her. how wld ur frenz feel towards her. somethings r better left unsaid.

tell u the truth, when i saw this, i was so tempted to use expletives on u all the way from japan.

i pitied her and took her as my stead

u pity her? who needs ur pitiness???? u call this love??? Pls grow up!!!

shower her with all that i could give..... spend my last cent on treating her to a good dinner

so what??? got monies big deal??? u dun even treat her wif respect in the first place when u "ke lian" her........ u think she'll be happy? u r not even true to urself, how can u be true to anyone else?

i felt its my responsibility to take care of her

again!!!! u and ur responsibilities........ go take care of ur reef tank. why bother taking care of her.

her late father told me to........ but now..... look how she treat me

this is not an excuse.

look at what u r saying....... read over ur post again a thousand times. think of what i hv said. see where u hv went wrong???

everyone has a story to tell. be it happy or sad........ it's their own life story.

i m sorry for my harsh tone. but u really piss me off.

juz me 2 cents. take it or leave it. enuff said.

[minsmarine]

Hey bro LS,

He is still young only 17. Even adult sometime when they r angry, they tell all the rubbish.

So , can I suggest let him learn from this.

He just need helping hands to go through since it's his First.

Let him says whatever he wants to and we just listen. He needs some1 to listen his story and console him. It's emotional effect and it's not joke some ppl even jump off from HDB remember.

Don't piss off so easy.

If you want to come back, no need ha, just give me the money you are going to spent for airticket, so I can buy new tank..... JK.

Cheers